Monday, 13 October 2008

• A somber subject

  Since you all probably know me to be a very upbeat person, I figured I'd better warn ya'll that the topic of this entry is not cheerful. I have been very frustrated lately with some cultural issues in Korea. One thing that has been bothering me immensely is the stress level in Korea. There is an intense pressure on young people to get into a great university, to then get a great job, and therefore live happily ever after. They are pressured from teachers, parents, bosses, and just about anyone that meets them. They are pressured to be better than the next person, to be in essence the best. I am teaching college age girls, so I have had numerous conversations with many of my students regarding this issue, and it troubles me greatly. I know I have to recognize cultural differences, and I keep telling myself that it's ok that they do things differently here. I keep telling myself these things because I want to be nonjudgemental of the culture. However, recently (as maybe some of you know) two very well known famous celebrities in Korea killed themselves. I teach these classes called Topic Discussion where the students are required to bring in an article to the class, and in essence, lead the class through a discussion of whatever topic they choose. Naturally, they bring in articles on these recent suicides...so we discussed it in great depth. We talked about social pressure here in Korea, and how people feel a social consciousness that they can't escape. How people are aware of what others are doing, and gossip spreads, and eventually weighs the person down greatly. So, of course, we really don't know why those two people killed themselves, and we may never understand it, but it does affect people to have such public figures do such a thing. For those of you guys that don't know, suicide is actually a big cause of death here, I don't know the figures, but I have heard that their suicides rates are among the top in the world. So, naturally after all this discussion, I was very burdened and frustrated about this issue. So, today, I went to work as normal, and one of my coworkers told me that his friend's ex-girlfriend( a Korean girl) just committed suicide in the states (she is in the states, going to a prestigious school). I met that girl, I went out with my coworkers and his friends one night, and this girl was there. I remember her. I can't explain how I felt today-a bit like I would throw up. This girl was only 29. Now, I know I shouldn't feel mad, but somewhere in me, I feel mad. I feel mad at Korea for telling girls that are 29 that they are old, for telling girls that they are fat, for pressuring them to succeed to the point that they feel that death is better than failure. Please somebody explain to me how this is good. Like I said, I have been wrestling with this frustration for a while now, and I WANT to understand this culture, but truly I believe something needs to change. These Koreans need to know that failure in fact can make a person stronger, that perfect is impossible, and that taking your life is not an option. I feel irritated that I can't just shake the people here, and tell them this truth about life, that there is HOPE, that tomorrow offers something different from today. If only I could, I would lecture the whole nation...but change doesn't happen like that. So, my mission is to talk to my students about this, like drill them about hope, and only maintain some kind of hope that the future of Korea will be a place that doesn't suck the life out of people by making them study constantly, that it can be a place where failure is only seen as an opportunity to take a new look at life.

  I am sorry to be so frank, and seemingly negative about Korea. I love this nation and the people here, but I do believe it is a real issue and something MUST be said about it.

  I do hope that the next time I write, I can be more cheerful about things.

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